My Thoughts

I have been meaning to blog about this for quite sometime (I know Danielle, get off my back *wink...lol) but have been trying to find the right words to get my point across. Not sure these are the "right" words, but here I go anyway.

The subject of this actually came about because Matt's mother asked me to help her out with a topic for her philosophy class. The question that she needed an answer to was: If a person has no religion, does that make them an immoral person? Ok...and for those of you who DO know about Matt's mom then you should know her answer to this....and if you KNOW me you should also know that we DON'T see eye to eye on this one. But, the topic has been brought up on several other occassions as well....today being the latest one and being that it is all fresh in my mind. I will sit here and blog about it. (You all know that I LOVE  to blog about "hot button" topics.) lol

By definition morality is as follows:

Morality (from Latin moralitas "manner, character, proper behaviour") refers to the concept of human action which pertains to matters of right and wrong—also referred to as "good and evil"—used within three contexts: individual conscience; systems of principles and judgments—sometimes called moral values—shared within a cultural, religious, secular or philosophical community; and codes of behavior or conduct morality

So the point that Matt's mother was trying to make is that if you do not follow "God's word" you are immoral (or in other words evil). But according to "God's word"  you should not judge, Though I have found myself in many situations that I am being judged on my unconventional lifestyle, and honestly in almost every one of these situations the judgement is being passed by a Christian. Which is just another example of the hypocrisy within the Christian religion. I have found that Christianity sort of follows a 'do as I say, not as I do' mindset.

Generally speaking, Christian parents are preaching to their children that they should love all persons equally, but yet on the other hand they are dismissing a gay person's right to wed. Many Christians frown upon homosexuality saying that "God" feels that homosexuality is a sin, but yet "God" teaches us to love each other equally. Well how is that so if homosexuality is a sin. A person cannot help who they fall in love with.

Still generally speaking Christian parents preach to their children that you should  not judge another. But yet these same people are passing judgement based on the unknown. I understand that people fear the unknown, but just educate yourself before passing judgement. Now don't get me wrong, I am not saying that I have never passed judgement, because certainly I have. I would be lying if I told you otherwise. I like to think I am pretty non-judgemental (and I think some people will vouch for that as well) and for the most part I will give anybody the benefit of the doubt. I base my judgement on the way that a person carries themselves and through their actions rather than just by their lifestyle. I have friends from very different walks of life, some are conservative Christians, some are liberal atheists but the wonderful thing about that is that they are all open minded and non judgemental and realize that people can be different, and have different beliefs but still be respectful of each other.

I am sure that any parent, not just Christian parents, strive to instill these same values in their children. But I think this is where I differ. I do not preach to my children, we do not attend a church, nor do we speak of "God" in our house. But that does not mean that I don't instill morals in my children.. My children have never heard me put somebody down based on their lifestyle, and I will try my hardest to keep it that way. They realize that everybody on this Earth is different and that is what makes it wonderful. I am also trying to teach my children that it is ok to be different. And for the most part I think I am succeeding. I have raised some wonderfully, free thinking children who have their own opinions and will stand by their convictions. And I can only hope that it will continue throughout their adult lives....AND I have done all of this through being an example of how a person should act, not by preaching a book of man made stories to them. Now if this makes me evil or immoral than so be it. But I think that many people can attest to the fact that I am not an evil person and my children aren't heathens. In fact, I am sure that people can vouch for what exciting, independent, strong, free thinking WONDERFUL children that I do  have.

In lieu of the recent tragedy at VT, I have been thinking a lot about what this world has come to, about how awful it would be to be a teenager in this day and age. Childhood is supposed to be a time of innocence and happiness, going through life without a care in the world. Instead children today have become angry, untrusting, callous individuals who think that it is acceptable to use physical force or violence to get what they want or to belittle those that are different. But who can blame them? Look at the state of America today...and throughout history. The US has always used physical force and violence in order to gain control over those that are weaker. Take the senseless war that we are involved in at the moment. Why are we there again? And for those die-hard Bush Lovers who think that this is because of 9/11...think again. That is not why we are there. Iraq had no part in what happened on that tragic day. We are there because Bush didn't like the way their country was being run, and yes things were exactly humane at times, yes Saddam was a very nasty man,...we helped him get to where he was at...but things are in total disarray now that we have changed their entire way of living, we have ruined their entire country. Now...don't take this as I don't support the troops, because that is NOT the case. They have NO say in the matter. All of their orders come from the top...they are just doing their job. But back on track now....this type of "do things our way or we will kill you" attitude has been prominent throughout all of US History.

Why is it so hard for most people to accept diversity? Diversity is what makes the world such a wonderful place. All of the medical and technological advances throughout history came from somebody who was strong enough to be different. Children are often afraid to be different for fear of the harassment that they will face at the hands...or mouths....of their peers. We as a society make it just as hard on those that are diffrent. Different is unknown, Americans fear the unknown. When we are frightened Americans resort to what we know best, violence. Violence is never the answer, you may feel that you have solved the problem, but it's still there people are always going to be different. The only way to overcome the fear is through education or knowledge.

Taunts, Threats, Violence, Vindication, Guns, Tragedy.....Face it folks, this is a common occurrence in schools across America. Columbine, Virgina Tech, The Amish School, SA Middle ...yes our conservative, mainstream, suburban school. Our tiny little community is a pawn in this game as well. Today we learned of a bomb threat for tomorrow (Friday)...which is more than likely some kid playing a prank....but you can never be too certain anymore. Nobody is safe.

What happened to the innocence of our children? I will tell you what happened, bigger houses, bigger cars, so called better lives that we as parents and a society think that we need. Now don't get me wrong, I want my children to have a better life than I had. But that better life does not have to include a car that costs more than the average Americans' annual salary or a house that is so huge that you have to use an intercom system to talk to your family. Basically this bigger is better attitude that we as a society have adopted is essentially pushing our families away. The days of gathering around a hot home cooked meal and discussing the events of their days are long gone, giving way to tedious work schedules and/or extracurricular activities. This so called better life that we are persuing comes with a cost, a HUGE cost, our childrens' innocence. Is it really worth it?

In the case of one of the Columbine shooters, his father called in voicing concern over that fact that he thought his child was doing the shooting. Ok...he was concerned at the time of the shooting...but where was he in the months prior. Why was he not concerned about his child before this horrific incident took place? Parents need to be more involved in their childrens' lives. It is your responsibility as a parent to protect your child, whether that be from a pedophile or themselves.

Love. What is love? Well the dictionary defines love as follows:

Main Entry: ¹love
Pronunciation: 'l&v
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English lufu; akin to Old High German luba love, Old English lEof dear, Latin lubEre, libEre to please
1 a (1) : strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties love for a child> (2) : attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3) : affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests <love for his old schoolmates> b : an assurance of love love>
2 : warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion <love of the sea>
3 a : the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration love> b (1) : a beloved person : DARLING -- often used as a term of endearment (2) British -- used as an informal term of address
4 a : unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another: as (1) : the fatherly concern of God for humankind (2) : brotherly concern for others b : a person's adoration of God
5 : a god or personification of love
6 : an amorous episode : LOVE AFFAIR
7 : the sexual embrace : COPULATION
8 : a score of zero (as in tennis)
9 capitalized, Christian Science : GOD

Love is such an intense, complex, complicated emotion to define that even the dictionary has 9 different (though sort of the same) ways to describe it. But this doesn't really tell you what LOVE really is.

Love has no boundaries, at least it shouldn't if it is "real" love. You cannot limit love based on gender, color, age, religion, or status for that matter. So, this actually has me thinking, if love has no boundaries and you cannot control who you love, then who is to say that you cannot love more than one mate. Now, just hear me out. I am not saying that we ALL should take on multiple partners, or become polygamists or anything like that, just think about this with an open mind.

Love is a very complex emotion, and can be determined and felt in many different ways. I mean, we certainly do not love every person in the same way. We don't love our parents the same, we don't love our friends the same, and most parents (even though they will deny it) don't love their children the same. This isn't saying that we love one child more than the other, we just love them differently. We love them each for their own personalities. Now still keeping your mind open, transfer all of those emotions onto a "mate." Is there a reason, other than society's taboo, that we cannot fully love two mates, I mean obviously no two people are the same, so they can both bring you a very intense feeling of love, even though they may be different kinds of love. Just as we love our children for their individual traits, the same can be said for lovers.

Perhaps polyamorists/polygamists know something more about love and life than we do. Putting religious and societal convictions aside regarding marriage and union, these people are allowing themselves to love and be loved by more than one person, which one would think would give each individual a sense of feeling  completely loved. I know there are times in my relationships where I feel that things are lacking, and despite open communication there are times when these voids cannot be filled by my one mate, whether it be because he is not capable of  doing what I would like, or whether it be a time constraint, or the fact that he just really does not want to fulfill that need. And I am sure the same can be said for him as well. I am sure that I don't fulfill his every desire either, and finding another mate that would fulfill that could possibly make things better for all of us involved. Granted this would all have to be experiences with an open mind, because jealousy can be a cruel emotion.

Now, no bashing here. I realize that relationships are supposed to be a compromise, and on all the "important" issues it should be. This is what makes a relationship work. But what about on the not so "important" issues, like going to the theater or the ballet, or certain hobbies and things. Why not spare your one "mate" the agony of attending these, as spare yourself the lack of enthusiasm (and possibly the following arguement) by attending this with another "mate" who enjoys it?

Ok...say I wiki'd love as well...and this is what wiki has to say about it:

The definition of love is the subject of considerable debate, enduring speculation, and thoughtful introspection. In ordinary use, love usually refers to interpersonal love, an experience felt by a person for another person. Love often involves caring for or identifying with a person or thing, including oneself (cf. narcissism). Dictionaries tend to define love as deep affection or fondness.^[1] In colloquial use, according to polled opinion, the most favoured definitions of love involve altruism, selflessness, friendship, union, family, and bonding or connecting with another.^[6]

The different aspects of love can be roughly illustrated by comparing their corollaries and opposites. As a general expression of positive sentiment (a stronger form of like), love is commonly contrasted with hate (or neutral apathy); as a less sexual and more mutual and "pure" form of romantic attachment, love is commonly contrasted with lust; and as an interpersonal relationship with romantic overtones, love is commonly contrasted with friendship, although other connotations of love may be applied to close friendships as well.

Now I know it is talking about lust here, but that is not what I am talking about. Yes, I know many people get love and lust confused. But what I am talking about is fully loving two or more people. I don't want to bring religion or societal taboo into this, just your heart and emotions. Granted many outside influences affect how we personally view things, which is why I like to look at everything with an open mind, and that's all I am asking of you. Look at this with an open mind, a completely open mind. What are your feelings on this?

Who was the first person to give you info -- correct or not -- on how to "make babies"? 
Submitted by Manon-It-All.

I don't know...prob health class in 4th grade I think.

Book:  Show us a great coffee table book.  

Ansel Adams: Classic Images

Ansel Adams

What decision changed the course of your life? 
Submitted by Ally.

Having children.

Buddha Head

Slacking a bit....just the top of Buddha head

still tired

dragging ass, very sore

floor done and grouted, just needs scrubbed and sealed, looks AWESOME

cant wait to get it all done so I can sleep in my bed

tomorrow night...yay.

work tomorrow, therapy too. BLECH

that's all.

g'nite

Would you sign a prenuptial agreement? Why or why not?
Submitted by Lantastic. 

Nope....1st off I wont be getting married at all. But...2nd...I think it's a lack of trust on whom ever is asking. I think it's insane.